If i am autistic which seems more and more likely it would certainly explain why I'm so interested in appearing and acting "normal" to my own detriment

@BellBell I have a great fear and disdain and a fundamental lack of trust of medical professionals. what insight would i really gain that I couldn't gain on my own?

@vriska It's hard to externalize a vision of yourself and deferentiate that from the norm. For example my fits of rage to me seemed normal, oh i just have anger issues I'd tell myself. I didn't realize it was an emotional cascade most people don't experience on a regular basis.

You gain the benifit of realizing your not unique and that several papers and peer reviewed studies exist on your archetype and that they have developed drugs and behavioral techniques tailored to your specific issues.

I've had a theory about you for a long time and autism doesn't make sense in that framework.

It makes sense to distrust the medical industry and it's useful to educate yourself on psychiatric disorders but getting an actual psych eval allows you to gain insight without trial and error. I got one, it was basically just a more indepth iq test. awnser 300 questions and preform these cognitive tasks. in one month we will tell you what we think is wrong.

it's not scary

@BellBell whats your theory about me btw lmao

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@vriska I've suspected for a long time you have moderate to severe adhd but that's not a diagnosis and you shouldn't run with it. I'm not a doctor i just picked up on some contextual clues that are similar to me.

@BellBell Oh I do, that's how I get my adderall. Great theory man lmao

@vriska oh cool. try atomoxetine and concertta, it works better for me than adderall

@BellBell Not familiar with atomoxetine, I'll look it up. Adderall has been life changing, honestly. If something works better I'd be interested

@vriska atomoxetine and concertta are cns stimulants and neruoepinephrine reuptake inhibitors and that's just a fancy way of saying prefrontal cortex go brrrrrr

@BellBell I already take welbutrin to great effect. Two neruoepinephrine re-uptake inhibitors mixed with welbutrins dopamine reup inhibition plus my tendency for mania seems risky. Pharmacology is an interest of mine though, still gonna read on it

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